Writing

me & my movie star friend
new orleans, 2012

A life not fully lived is a life not worth having. And if you don't get it, your body will - and it will have consequences. Thankfully I have learned with age how to pay attention to these signs and am getting better at listening to myself. The big Universal joke is that whenever I go off my path - the Universe is very quick to yell it in my face - getting me back on it once again.

I keep on going back to the spirit that I seemed to be connected with when I was a child. It was an unshakeable belief that there was purpose to my presence. It became very clear to me that although I am attracted to various arts, that writing was to be my tool. This was revealed to me at an early age.

One of the aspects of my life that I am truly thankful for is having parents who always understood and supported my artistry.  My writing and my being a writer has never been up for discussion in my family- even in times when it was not my full-time profession. I am greatly indebted to that. It is important as an artist to understand the sacred separation between art and profit. It is not that the two cannot meet - it is that one fuels the other. And one must be clear about that.

About a year ago I realized that I needed to travel to heal. I wanted to go out to see Angela, a spiritual sister of mine who lives out in Hawaii. Angela is involved with ancestral healing and is a living embodiment of what I feel modern womanhood to  look like. All my life I have been searching for "woman" - I have been searching for the meaning of this energy outside of biblical and stereotypical tenants.  And when I met Angela, she gave me my first peek into what was possible.

Although I was born in the concrete does not mean that I am of the concrete. Yes, I am of Brooklyn - I have walked her streets, bled on her streets, cried on her streets - but I have always known something more profound than that. I am of the earth of Brooklyn. I am of the earth of Trinidad. I am of the earth of Maui. I am earth. You are too.

I no longer think that people are singularly bad or ill-intentioned. I realize and accept now that society creates this bucket effect - where many of us are feeling and acting like we are crabs in that bucket! There's this constant feeling that there is never enough - when all reasoning will tell us otherwise. There is a surplus of untapped energy and it is this I seek to unleash.

BUT:

1.  I am not here to fix anyone.
2. No one is here to fix me.


I'm in the process of moving. I mean, like really moving. Like I sold my apartment, have like 6 days to move out! And I'm cleaning out. Wow. It's an end to my tenure out here on Shit Island (as the locals call it) and I suspect, an end to a very challenging, yet most enriching venture in my life. I have learned a lot. And the most important lesson?

Listen to yourself. 



Meanwhile dreams manifest and as I unload I attract truly - the things that are necessary to create.

It feels good to have completely dedicated my life to writing.

Adieu,

Lesley-Ann


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